Post Partum: Trusting the Journey
When I became pregnant, during the pregnancy and after, I was certain that particular chapter of my journey would spark a new depth of creativity. I was certain that the things I would write and share would look and feel a lot differently than the often times heavy writings I'd grown accustomed to writing. It did, but when that didn't happen immediately as I anticipated and yearned for there was disappointment, a feeling of inadequacy. But then I realized that I was shedding and growing simultaneously. I was hurting, healing and transcending. In every aspect of my being; physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. In the thick of things, I realized and learned to lean into the feeling of discomfort and change. I trusted that She was just on the other side. It was all a lot to take in and unpack.
I think that I naively got to a place where I felt I'd done so much work and healing, and as a result I should have been rewarded with nothing to talk about except flowers and butterflies lol (that's an exaggeration, however you get the picture) I had to remember that the work doesn't stop. That there are levels to everything, that applies specifically in this case to our healing as well. I had a whole a$$ baby! I needed to remind myself of that often. I needed to be patient, because certainly the "ah ha's", lessons and teachable moments were well on their way. And only when I would be still long enough and quiet enough to listen and use the gift of discernment would I be able to fully maximize what was to be received from these teachable moments.
Fast forward, I've slowly started to discover my voice again + implement the new found clarity. These days wearing it as an additional layer of confidence which in turns translates into creativity in how I show up in the world.